People do say; Look at the brighter side of an incident. But my mother –in-law is known for finding faults (only in my case). If I switch on fan, she will turn off the fan saying she was feeling so chill. She would sweat to the core, but she would not switch on the fan. Such an adamant.
She always complained about my behaviors to my husband. If I clean a vessel, she would take the cleaned vessel and wash it again. She would scream at me, “Dirt’s are still there. You are known for doing incomplete works” .
It did hurt me to the core. Many times, I feel like giving her a strong reply. But considering my husband’s love towards his mom, I never give her a reply.
“Oh God, She is using too much soap and my saree is getting faded soon” that would be her typical answer though I wash her Saree and dry it properly and perfectly. After my child’s birth, I thought things would change. But she would poke into my child. She would keep advising me. Don’t use that soap. Use this oil. Don’t bath him so long and many such.
For what am I keeping mum? My rational thinking suggested taking a separate house and live a life with my husband and my little ones. Many times, it did advise me to give her a strong reply. But I was not that strong to hurt an elderly lady. More than all, she is my husband’s mother. Right or wrong, I should not speak something that might hurt her. So, I never replied, hiding all my pains inside.
But every day, before I go to sleep I had that sense of satisfaction. Because, if I reply something, she would reply back and this would end in fight. At the end of the day, my family sleeps peacefully that’s what I wanted.
It was during last year Diwali time, My husband and Kids went for shopping to purchase new dress for everyone. My mother-in-law was a sugar patient and hence she avoided to come for shopping. She will have a tough time facing those crowds and stand for so long.
I chose a saree for myself and dress for my kids in 10 minutes. (believe me I did). My husbands selection too got over in 5 minutes. But for my mother-in-law, I almost scanned all the sarees and roamed 4 shops to get a best one. She is my second mother my heart echoed. I chose her the costliest saree and my husband was content on my attitude and good nature.
But a shock was waiting as I reached my home. I removed the price tag from her saree, so that she might not feel its costly. On showing the saree, she started cribbing that the color was not good, design is vague, material is of cheap quality and on so. I did not reply anything. Went inside my room and cried. My husband was pissed off on his mother’s behavior
He explained her, how much time I spend for selecting her saree and gave her a slight warning that her behaviors is slightly becoming intolerable. My typical mother-in-law reply was “Gosh, I brought up my son for 28 years; This lady came and took her. My son is fighting with me for his wife”
Since I knew that I have my husband’s support I thought of picking up fight and give her a good reply. But my heart suggested, her behaviors were innocent.
May be, She has a fear that I may take her son away from her. Violence or anger is not the solution for anger. I need her and her support. My hubby needs her too. My kids needs grandma love.
My heart said, Love could win an angry heart. I came out of the room and said, “sorry ma, I could not fulfil your expectations.” I took my mobile, Installed Snapdeal app the next moment and said, “Ma, you can now choose your saree for yourself. Please select the saree which you like and tell me. I will place the order for you.”
My mother-in-law took the mobile and scanned the saree that was displayed in the saree section of snapdeal. She turned to a child on knowing that she can select something for herself just by sitting at home.
Above all, she was excited by seeing the Price filter range. if you go to shop, the Shop keeper’s first question would be what’s your price range? If in case, you stumble upon a costlier saree, and ask them to display that saree, the shop keeper would reply saying, “Its cost more.” and don’t even show you. My mother-in-law filtered those saree from high price and was feeling excited on seeing all the saree. I read out the description for her.
She chose one for herself and I placed the order. She asked me, “what if I don’t like the saree after I see it?”
“Well ma, you can return. And our money will be refunded without any question.”
After placing the order, I replied her, “Ma, I respect you as much as I do my mother. If I say my family, it means, you, your son and your grandchildren. Those words came from my heart and she felt the truth in my eyes. She hugged me; I touched her feet for her blessing. Later that incident her attitude towards me changed a lot. These days, she calls me to open Snapdeal app to check some toys for her grandchildren’s. She selects by herself, place the order with cash on delivery. Because of high sugar, she missed the fun of shopping. Her exhilaration is brought back again with online Snapdeal app. The excitement, she gets on receiving the item she orders and while gifting it to her grandchildren are mind-blowing..